10,000 B.C.Far out "history"  March 12,
2008 12:58:25 PM
MUD-SMEARED MAN: Steven Strait as Anglo hero D'leh.
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Roland Emmerich has set aside his usual end-of-days scenario (Independence
Day, The Day After Tomorrow) and gone back to the beginning. A product of public schooling, my knowledge of history can be a bit sketchy, so I’ll take Emmerich as his word. The pyramids were built 7500 years earlier than I seem to recall, and why not? Woolly mammoths make cheap labor. What were they doing in Egypt? Well, it must have been easy to get around, since there was only one continent 12,008 years ago. A really small continent, since the Anglo hero, D’leh (Steven Strait), is able to traverse its (flat?) surface in a matter of days without so much as needing a shave. Using his Androclean skills with a sabertooth tiger to amass an African army, he saves Evolet (Camilla Belle), his blue-eyed girlfriend, from Evil Arabs with electronically enhanced voices. Omar Sharif’s soothing narration keeps you from confusing this with Apocalypto and its outrageous “history.” 109 minutes | Boston Common + Fenway + Fresh Pond + Chestnut Hill + suburbs
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